Hiatus

It’s been far too long since I’d updated. I’ve been a tad busy, mostly with year-end presentations, seminars and workshops. I’m looking forward to a less hectic December schedule, insyaAllah; most of my lab work should consist of sequencing and haplotype analysis, save for some PCR reruns on a few particularly stubborn DNA samples.

Anyway, it’s come to my attention recently that some of my readers are interested in my blog for the things I do as a researcher, and not as a layman bent on publicizing her personal, day-to-day grouse against the world. Indeed, I think that’s what I’ve been doing the past few entries. Grouse, I mean.. In my own defense, I never intended for this blog to be anything but my own thoughts, be that personal or otherwise. And lately, those ‘thoughts’ have veered more to the personal.

It’s the end of the year. Sue me.

Despite that, I will own up to a slight lack of focus in my current research, and I do apologize to my more professional readers for this lackadaisical attitude. Sometimes enthusiasm for what you do can only go so far in helping you achieve your goals. Being a fresh graduate with no experience or qualifications certainly does not help, and finding that everyone else seems to be one step ahead of you in the all-consuming scientific rat race serves well to dampen your spirit even further.

I could go on with more negativity, but I digress.

But things are looking up. I’ve personally met a few people I could count on for enlightenment on the subject of genetics, one of them the elusive Mr. T. I have directions now; there is a speck of light at the end of the tunnel, yeay! I will share more with you once I’ve gotten past my coming-back-to-work-after-weeks-of-out-of-office lag phase ya. Till then….

Haih, aku nak CUTI!

Dah seminggu rutin tidur aku terganggu.

Buat julung kalinya aku nak kena present research progress di hadapan warga professional FRIM. Sepatutnya tak ada masalah. Projek aku berjalan lebih kurang lancar. Walaupun hasilnya belum lagi jelas, namun banyak improvements.

Tapi aku tengok supervisor aku macam ada tujuan lain untuk Project Evaluation Meeting ni. Dia tak cakap banyak, tapi dari cara dia teliti slide presentation projek aku, aku dah nampak apa yang bermain dalam benak dia.

This is my debut. My biggest chance at making a good first impression. Orang dah banyak mengata; aku dapat kerja sebab aku anak staf. Ihsan majikan. Aku kira sedikit sebanyak tempiasnya akan kena juga pada penyelia. Jadi nilah masanya aku nak perbetulkan tanggapan orang. Aku ada substance; aku boleh contribute.

I've been hired on good merits, not excellent 'cables'..

On the other hand, aku naik rimas lagi menyampah untuk sentiasa pertahankan diri. Tak boleh ke kalau aku biarkan je? Lantaklah orang nak kata apa. Yang penting aku tak serabut.

Malangnya aku tak hidup dalam dunia sendiri - that was the case during my undergrad years. Bila dah kerja ni semua perkara ada penilaian. Ada laporan dan dokumentasi. ISO gitu.. macam aku ni takde lain kerjanya hanya berdiri di hujung telunjuk.

At least 'No' used to be an option. These days..